imagination

     Most of us have a specific time or place when our imagination seems to explode, or at least leak through. For me, it is most often in the evening. The day and all it's "to do's" are now finished and it is a time to reflect.

     I cannot nail to the floor a particular place in which I receive the most inspiration. And even if I could, I would not tell, lest it diminish the ambience of that cherished place. Speaking generally, it is often found, or realized, in the great outdoor spaces where there is "scope for the imagination."

     I must admit that those evenings when I feel creative and ambitious do not always have beneficial outcomes. I recall having the bright idea, and having been strongly encouraged by my younger sister, I cut myself some bangs. Bobby pins were my best friend that summer, as I would not be seen in public without them pinned up.  I also nearly bobbed my hair the other night, but remembered how my last expedition went. ^^ I think my prospects are looking up, though... both my wisdom teeth are surfacing on bottom. 

A New Year

I used to dream of 2011 in anticipation, now it's only a memory. I was looking back through my journal of all that made this past year unique and also compiling a list of those things which I am looking forward to in 2012. Another year in which we can serve God. Why should we do anything to affect this world since the natural disasters and corruption we are seeing has been prophesied about? Because we know the Victor of this battle - we know the final outcome. However, we can affect the casualty list. My cry is that of Isaiah, "Here am I. Send me!" Have a blessed new year.

thoughts

     I am currently dealing with a very painful two day old neck ache. I am unsure of what caused it, but if you think of if, I would appreciate your prayers. A recent outbreak of hives has also been added to the lot. I've been drinking much hot tea on this chilly winter day, which is very soothing, laying on a neck role (trying to fix whatever is wrong) and itching. All the while I've been thinking some thoughts I thought I'd share with you....

After reading Wrestling Prayer, Set-Apart Femininity and being in the midst of Tortured For Christ, God has been impressing some points upon my heart, which I have been praying about and pondering. 

       

I have realized the oh-so-important necessity and power of prayer! I feel like I've just begun to live - that is, just begun to know my Savior (who is my life). Also, the importance of praying specifically and tenaciously. "Boldly we approach the throne of God." I've been praying earnestly for the Lord to give me His love for others and to burden my heart for the unbeliever. It broke my heart, after examining myself, to read what Richard Wurmbrand says in his book, Tortured For Christ,

"A Flower, if you bruise it under you feet, rewards you by giving you its perfume. Likewise  

Christians, tortured by the communists, rewarded their torturers by love. We brought many of our

  jailors to Christ. And we are dominated by one desire: to give communists who have made us 

suffer the best we have, the salvation which comes from our Lord Jesus Christ."

       How can someone who has been brutally beaten, mocked, threatened, stripped of dignity and at times even sanity, who is tortured day after day after day for years, still love those who inflict this misery? I thought about this phenomenon for days, weeks even. And so has begun my quest for this unshakable, all consuming love. One that is patient and kind, doesn't envy nor boast and is not proud. It is not rude, self-seeking, easily angered and keeps no record of wrongs. One that does not take delight in evil, but rejoices in truth. A love that protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres. A love that will never fail. (I Cor. 13:4-8a paraphrased)

       I desire a set-apart life. A life that is completely poured out for the Kingdom of God. I desire to serve and invest all my time and energy in ministry and meaningful relationships with those around me. I desire to be a prayer-warrior and live a selfless life. I desire for my life and my relationships to be glorifying to Him.  I desire to serve my Lord in any and every opportunity He calls me to.

       Just thought I'd share with you what the Lord has been laying upon my heart. I would strongly encourage you to read all three of these books I have mentioned if you have not already. They are life-changing!

"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them." ~ John 17:25-26

"To become a sentinel for the body of Christ demands a mind, a heart, and a body wholly set apart and consecrated for such sacred work. It demands rigorous loyalty of soul - a meticulous purity of heart and mind." - Eric Ludy

"oh what a day for a daydream..."

Riding this evening as the sun was disappearing over the horizon, I felt so contented. Thinking all the while of how very blessed I am.

"Being rich of heart makes you wealthy beyond compare." - Rodney Williams

Simple things can give me such profound pleasure. Whether it is holding a clicky, inky pen and a piece of scratch notebook paper or walking through the dewy grass barefoot at 6:30 in the morning; I enjoy finding the hidden gifts each day in an ordinary life.... 


Making someone smile, waltzing with your pretended partner in an open field (hoping no one is watching), cooking in the kitchen with the inspiration of Julia Child (*note* this "inspiration" is not fool proof - you're still liable to burn your souffle), laughing off an embarrassing moment, re-arranging a cluttered space into an organized, accessible and aesthetically pleasing area, reading such an incredibly inspirational and profound Scripture passage that you want to share it with the whole world!, sitting at the piano composing a ballad which you'll soon forget, cleaning the house with vigor (*hint* for those of you who lack motivation, just pretend all your in-laws are coming over in 3 hrs - that should do it!), writing a letter, laying in the damp grass on a clear night and marveling at the LORD's beautiful stars (all of which are named and accounted for by Him) and the list goes on and on......

For me, home is the place where most of this takes place. It is the warm, inviting glow of the kitchen chandelier which is a bit too dim because only two of the light bulbs are currently employed; the rough, unfinished hardwood floors which turn my bare feet two shades too dark; the sunlight shining through the south windows onto my desk; our creaky steps (after skipping the third one to the bottom, take two at a time and you'll reach the top without waking the whole house), etc... 


A small house is actually a blessing. The five occupants of it are forced to get along and enjoy each other's company. After all, it would be foolish to be enemies with someone you run into every four minutes. But that's where the great outdoors come into the picture - I often escape to the barn loft or take a walk down "lover's lane" (My version of Anne's dubbed path). Perhaps it's my Father coming out in me. He'll say that the woods are calling him and then he's off, on what he calls, a "walk-about." I often get the same irresistible urge.

Some may think me a strange, sentimental fool for treasuring such things.... but then again, "If you've never been thrilled to the very edges of your soul by a flower in spring bloom, maybe your soul has never been in bloom." ~Audra Foveo

"I know not what the future holds, but I know who holds the future." ~Author Unknown

future >noun  1 (the future) time that is still to come.  2 events or conditions occurring or existing in that time.  3 a prospect of success or happiness

 ..................................................................................................................
Thinking of my future is exciting! I do not know what lies there waiting, however, as a Christian, I know God has my future planned. My job is to keep my eyes focused on Him and follow His leading.
We all know the Bible verse in Psalm 119, "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." Isn't it interesting that God doesn't give us a torch light to see the way; He gives us a lamp, by which we can see our feet, but not beyond. My mother has always said she wishes she could have a barge light! ;) Then we can see whats coming up, prepare for it, change course, etc... But that's not God's will for us. He strengthens our faith by only allowing us to see what's directly in front of us. We feel like blindfolded fools stumbling around in the dark, till He comes along, holds our hand, guides us and promises never to leave us (..."As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you." - Joshua 1:5b) We can choose to stumble in the dark, or we can take every step with confidence, with the assurance that our Father is safely leading us.


Proverbs 4:11-12 says, "I guide you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble."

I'm eagerly awaiting what the Lord has in store for my life, but in the meantime, I'm patiently and contently waiting.....

Hymns

I've lately been expanding my musical repertoire by working on hymns. They are an amazing work of art. They are encouraging, comforting and inspiring.

Sitting down to the piano and playing through the hymnal is already a favorite activity of mine. It is so enjoyable, that I tend to slack a bit with my other books, since it is those that actually seem like "practice." Not necessarily because they're hard, but they seem dull and tedious in comparison. Besides, when I play hymns, not only am I practicing, but at the same time spending time with God and worshiping Him! I wonder if my teacher will buy that excuse?....Well, I think not. So, I will continue to practice my tedious Hanon exercises.

I am constantly distracted while practicing the hymns, because I love the verses so much I have to write them down in my journal. 

Here are some of my favorite that I've written down:

"Have fear and doubt come against your mind?

Has your faith been sorely tired?

Lift up your eyes - here cometh your help!

It is Jesus - for you He has died"

 - "Rise and Be Healed"

....................

"O for a faith that will not shrink,

Tho' pressed by every foe,

That will not tremble on the brink

Of any earthly foe"

- "O for a Faith That Will Not Shrink"

 ....................

"May the mind of Christ, my Savior,

Live in me day to day,

By His love and pow'r controlling

All I do and say"

- "May the Mind of Christ, My Savior" 

....................

 "I give all my future to You,

I give all my future to You;

No matter the cost or what others do,

I give all my future to You"

- "I Give All to You"

    

two thousand and eleven *2011*

I thought the years were supposed to fly by when you are older, not seventeen. Nevertheless, it flew. 2010 was here and gone. But it's remnants have manifested themselves in my life.

2010 was a year of struggles and triumphs -- for myself and my family. The Lord was faithful and saw us through the trials that last year brought, but He also caused our faith to grow tremendously in Him. James 1:2-4 has been my favorite verse the last few years. He talks about how we should consider trials to be pure joy. This verse has helped me keep an eternal focus on my life, rather than carnal.

A definite highlight of 2010 was attending Worldview Academy! That week (the best week of my life) really caused my to grow in my walk with the Lord. 

Yes, I had a big, long '10 reading list (non-fiction)....how far I got on it? Well, lets just say I have a lot to make up for this year. ;-)

------------------------------------------------------------

 I've many goals for 2011 and it sounds like a promising year. I'll be graduating; starting an online business; teaching; working; following Christ and being a light on a hill; hopefully attending TeenPact and Worldview Academy again; becoming a "legal" adult ;-); getting my drivers license; reading like crazy; and.... who knows what else the year will bring?

I'm excited to see/experience what God has in store for my life in 2011.

{ My Country Tis of Thee, Sweet Land of Liberty. Of Thee I Sing... }

While driving yesterday afternoon, we saw "liberty bells," the Tea Party movement's symbol, placed in the yards of the common American people. I felt deep gratitude to those who are proudly displaying their liberty bells, showing to everyone how they have not given up - they're still fighting for their freedom - the freedom that so many died for and are still sacrificing for.

Some believe the actual Boston Tea Party in 1773 to have been a disrespectful and rebellious act. But in reality, the Boston Tea Party was done lawfully.

"By law, if cargo coming into the harbor was not unloaded within twenty days, it was legally subject to seizure." After the unloaded cargo sat in the harbor for twenty days, the people heard whoops from an Indian who was headed towards the wharf. The "Indians" asked for keys to the chests of tea and assured they would not harm the crew.

They opened 342 chests of tea for over three hours, while more than 10,000 people lined the wharf watching in complete silence as the tea was dumped overboard. Governor Hutchinson, said after watching the procession, "You could hear nothing but hatchets on the chests. Everything was quiet. It was done peacefully and lawfully. I was amazed!"

Benjamin Franklin once said, "Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God." This quote can be justified. God has given, as our Declaration of Independence states, inalienable rights. We have the God-given liberty to do what we wish with our lives, so long as we do not violate God's moral law or another man's rights. Liberty has come at a cost and it is maintained at a cost. That cost will become increasingly higher if we, as responsible citizens, do not take heed to the increasing amount of tyranny that is being imposed upon us and our businesses. The Revolutionary War was fought under the pretenses of much less governmental tyranny than what is being seen today. 

A quote that many of us are familiar with from Edmund Burke says, "All that is necessary for evil to triumph, is for good men to do nothing." Are you doing nothing?

*thought for the day:* "A free government has often been compared to a pyramid;... it is laid on the broad basis of the people." -James Wilson, Justice of the first Supreme Court

:::random thoughts:::

I can't believe how fast the months are flying by! Each day is bringing me closer to the end - the end of high school, that is. Then comes the inevitable, inescapable question: "Where are you going to college?" Oh boy... I'm not looking forward to this. I'm not planning on going to college. *horror; gasp; confusion!*

I've already had extended family members and teachers tell me how well I'd do in college and how much potential I have. But I'm not interested in myself. I want God's will for my life. Period! I've been praying specifically about this for the past two years and do not feel that college is in my future.

So, after everyone gets over the shock (and they eventually will), they'll ask: "Well, what exactly are you going to do with your life after you graduate?" I have compiled a list of many things I want to accomplish after my graduation, but here is a short excerpt from my journal:

- Take over most of Beth's school. (I want to homeschool my children someday, so I thought I could start practicing with my younger sister who will be a freshman next yr. plus, I do love to teach! :)

- Start my online business. * Dreamemarieproducts ;) (I haven't started on it yet)

- Teach piano lessons. (as well as diligently trying to improve upon my own playing)

- Do a complete home makeover!!!! ... well, at least re-arrange, paint, organize, clean, de-clutter, and do anything that has ever been neglected.

- Officially *learn* how to can fruits and vegetables and make all types of jam and jellies. Sure, I can with mom all the time, but I don't always pay attention to what she's doing. We just have a blast talking and splashing tomato juice everywhere :)

- Learn all that I can from mom about health & nutrition.

- Keep my head out of the clouds.... (yes, this will be difficult) :b

- Focus on ministry opportunities

- Be involved in politics in and around my community

- Go on a Mission Trip!!! :)

- Be the Salt and Light of the world!! - Matthew 5:13

- Continue learning about everything

- Become a terrific seamstress..... well, fair at least.....

- Hopefully get the opportunity to train some "green" (meaning untrained, not the actual color) horses!

- Do Hard Things. :D

There are many more goals and dreams I have, but I won't bore you with any more. I have a Yorkshire terrier sleeping my lap (we're dog-sitting) and I'm beginning to get a leg cramp. :b

*thought for the day:* "A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education." - Theodore Roosevelt

"So long status qoe, I think I just let go....."

Did you know? Teenagers aren't expected to care about politics! *gasp* Perhaps it's that I'm home-schooled, or maybe it's just that God gave me a passion for it... but I care. A lot. After all the lives that were given to obtain our freedom, it saddens me to see so many ignorant people voting parties, not values or convictions. You will surely see the final decline in our great Nation and very soon, if there is not a Third Great Awakening. If you want to ruin a Nation you must separate it from its roots (Christianity). That's what's happening. If you're able, please Vote Nov. 2. GET INVOLVED IN POLITICS!!! | I am now finished with my rant. Thank you. | 

Ever wondered what the Founding Fathers would think if they came back today?

.....I've thought about it. I know they would be appalled by what is happening in our society. What happened to absolute truth? Well that "Truth" comes from God and everything is becoming more and more relative because that Truth has been taken out of our society. They would be shocked about how we have allowed the liberty that they fought so hard for (to the point of giving their lives and all possessions), to slip away. Liberty comes at great costs and it is maintained at great costs. We have failed by not upholding this freedom. Galations 5:1 says, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." - God intends for us to be free!

What do you think our Founding Fathers would think if they attended our Churches in America today? They would be horrified at the apathy they would see. As well as not hearing a word about what is happening right here, right now in our society and how we need to stop it! In the 1700's, Pastors would openly preach against certain political views that were not consistent with the Scriptures. They would be very active in politics and society. However, the Church has now separated itself from the things outside it, and view it all as secular. The Church actually has the nerve to say "we're not interested in politics." Some pastors will not even disclose what their political views are! If they can't admit that, it's a wonder they are strong enough to admit they are Christians??

"When the Spirit of the Lord comes into the heart of a man, that man is liberated. Likewise when the Spirit of the Lord comes into a nation, that nation is liberated.... Spiritual freedom ultimately produces political freedom. External political slavery reflects internal spiritual bondage." - Bellies & Josh McDowell

* things that maketh me happy *

* chilly fall weather.

* thinking of my brother as I wear his old sweater (which is two sizes too big)

* riding bareback with halter and lead rope at 7:30 in the morning

* listening to my favorite songs

* mastering a difficult song on the piano

* reading novels

* making school schedules

* teaching my younger sister her eight subjects in school (& creating my own lessons for her geography)

* having windows open

* going on walks

* writing blog posts

* thinking

* being barefoot

* chocolate

* coffee, cream and sugar

* the Rebelution

* being dogmatic when I know I'm right ;)

* having a loving sister to confide in and three awesome, caring older brothers!!!

* being a child of God

Memories...

Oh the joys of growing up with three older brothers! I remember John and I going around the lake barefoot when I was five years old (mom didn't know). He would make me stay on the muddy shore and catch tiny frogs, while he waded out in the water with shorts and no shirt catching minnows. When we got back to the house, after going completely around the lake, I would help him skin the fish, kill the frogs and then feed his turtles in the baby pool - one of them being a snapping turtle.

I remember running down towards the lake chasing the geese with Josh; building snowmen in the middle of the "frozen" lake with James; going on canoe rides and fishing with Dad; swimming in the cove and more... I remember when James made a big bike ramp and, after much practicing (and without mom's knowing), he persuaded John, Josh, Beth and I to lay down at the end of the ramp, so it was like an extension. Of course, the older ones filed in next to the large black ramp and Beth and I were strung out on the end! He did, thankfully, clear it!

I remember playing with John's pet snake; catching crawdads and water spiders with the neighbor boy in the creek; running barefoot across my favorite bridge - a big tree that fell over the ditch; all five of us kids grabbing John's mattress (as soon as mom got on the phone) and dragging it down the hall to the carpeted staircase, where we laid it down and all hopped on! (you just had to be careful not to hit your head on the stairwell). And when we didn't feel like dragging out the mattresses, a sleeping bag worked just as well!


I remember the police man, who lived in our neighborhood, used to have a big open house on the 4th and set fireworks off over the lake - we could just sit on our deck and watch them all night. That evening, Josh and I decided to sneak over there and grab some food! I think we went unnoticed for the most part, so we ducked under the tables, grabbed handfuls of food and ran home (it was only four houses from ours). We were so naughty...

I remember moving up to the farm and eating breakfast out in the Quonset hut, because there wasn't electricity in the house yet; using a towering stack of drywall as a couch, before we had any furniture moved in; seeing foot prints on the ceiling in the bathroom, because someone walked on the drywall before hand; untangling black snakes out of cherry tree nets; getting my first horse; spilling sap all over my legs and down my boots as I tried to navigate my way on the hillsides and freezing my wet feet in the process; the whole family venturing out into the woods with an axe to go find the perfect Christmas tree; playing with Deacon (our big, black, Rottweiler) at night with Dad and the boys and watching him tackle and chew on T-bone... aka: Josh. I remember squirrel hunting with Josh, playing monsters with John and hanging out with James.

The Edgar kid's secret place (which was revealed to good friends only) was "The Slide." It was basically a humongous, steep hill tucked back in the woods, near a creek bed. It used to be covered in moss, until we made it our "slide." It was a tough climb to the top and even if you were almost there, you often slipped and did somersaults back down again. I could climb it pretty well, thus making my nickname "mountain goat."

And last, but not least, I remember the fort that we kids made one summer in the corn field. You had to walk in about 20 rows before you came to the entrance. The entrance was a short hallway that opened up into a large living room with separate bedrooms. We had a lot of fun in the corn that summer, however when fall rolled around, the farmer inevitably saw "the fort." He and Dad weren't too happy! And these... are some of my favorite memories.....